so, i've now lived in my home for three years. in that time i've come to know my neighbors fairly well; enough to have shed tears when DOTTIE's husband died due to post-operative complications [aspiration] from cancer surgery six weeks ago. DOTTIE lives on my left, PAPA JOE and MANILA [his significant other] live on my right. there is a group home directly across the street with an excellent, 24-hr staff and 3 residents. my favorite is STARSHINE. she is wheelchair bound and has difficulty speaking. however, i have little difficulty understanding her since my friend BOPI from THAT PLACE had severe "stroke" dialect that i learned to understand. STARSHINE has an electric wheelchair and gets out and about quite a lot from spring until the snow is too deep to navigate.
it's nice to know my neighbors and this year presented a unique occurrence in that PAPA JOE played matchmaker between his son and me. not that we hadn't noticed each other before, mind you. we have talked many times over the past three years. but, we have never broached the subject of dating. i, myself, have been getting to know someone over the past year [friends only, but there was potential] so i hadn't thought about dating anyone. over the past few months the potential dropped to nil because, despite having known each other for close to ten years, he still doesn't trust me enough to invite me into his home. i'm not perfect by any means. i made the mistake of telling him that i checked on his home when he was out of town after a tornado struck our area. i used local, online county tax records to get the address and he thought that was stalking. [i had remembered the name of his landlord. yes, i have an excellent memory.] for the record, his was not the first - nor the only - home i checked that night. i checked on five other friends' homes that night as well after the tornado touched down. i made the decision to check on his because he was out of town and has expensive electronic equipment in his home & also owns and adores a cat. i was concerned about looting and his pet should there be any structural damage. he freaked the f*&% out when i told him; literally and figuratively so, although my motives were pure, i apologized. i understand why he was upset. he misunderstood my intentions. eventually, i believe that he came to understand that i was being a friend not a stalker. but, the fact of the matter remains, he did not, nor does, he trust women. he practically brags that he is a misogynist. i don't expect him to change. i simply want and deserve more.
thanks to PAPA JOE and MOTHER EARTH [my best friend], i have it.
more to follow.